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CBT: Pain and Pleasure?



There is no polite way to say the word for the ‘C’ in CBT, so I will come out and say it, CBT means Cock and Ball Torture.  Just saying these words would make most men cringe, while making other’s dicks stand up and say “HI.”

For those people who find pain to be pleasurable, will certainly find this article entertaining and enlightening.

The first question someone asks who has just learned by CBT asks me is why?  Why would someone do that to themselves.  Well that’s a great question!  I think every man is different and there are probably an infinite number of answers.  So unfortunately, I can’t answer that question.

Amazingly enough, there are so many things you can do to your cock with even household items to torture it, so I’ve provided tons of information to guide you on your way if you’re interested in trying it.

If you are a novice, then you probably don’t have any of the CBT gear that is out there, however, if you have dabbled a lot, then you might enjoy some of these I am about to discuss.

The first is a chastity device. While it may not necessarily cause physical pain on your cock or balls, if you try to get an erection while wearing one it certainly will.  It can be more of a mind game than physical.  Knowing that someone else has control over whether your cock can get hard can be very painful and pleasurable.

There is the cock/ball divider, which is a strap that divides each ball so that your partner can spend time on each individually. The cock harness, sometimes called the “gates of hell,” which wraps around the cock while it’s semi-erect, so that when it does get erect, it hurts, and then it can also be attached to a cock leash and your partner can lead you around.

Then there are sounds or penis plugs.  Sounds are long, typically metal, sticks that get inserted all the way down inside the shaft into your urethra.  Yes, it is okay if you are grabbing your dick in pain right now reading this!  The plugs are much smaller and plug up the head to stop the semen from coming out.  It can be painful to have the cum build up in the shaft, and that is what people who are into CBT like.

There are ball stretchers which are usually leather straps that wrap around the base of your balls and stretch your balls down.  Add weights to them to stretch them out more. Weights are typically called parachutes.

Ball crushers are also fun to use on someone.  Imagine two wooden planks attached by screws, and you can tighten the screws and squish your balls.  That’s the basic concept, except they come in all forms like plastic, metal, and leather.

Of course you can use nipple clamps on your balls as well, but they do make clips specifically for your balls.

There are other items you can buy and if you did a search on the web for CBT toys, you’ll find all sorts of fun stuff to play with!

Now onto the part where I tell you how to use household items for your CBT pleasure!

If you are interested in tying up your cock and/or balls, shoe string works great and is easy to come by.  Separating your balls can be extra torturous when using any string.

As I said before, nipple clamps can be used on your balls, but you say you don’t have nipple clamps? Try binder clips or cloths pins.  Binder clips will really hurt and cloths pins won’t be as painful, but both will work on your cock and balls.

If you’re interested in inserting things down into the shaft of your penis, rule one is to make sure you don’t hurt yourself.  Q-tips can be very painful when dry, so lube them up first, but be careful because the cotton can get stuck inside and cause problems later. I have some clients who put bengay or icy hot on the tip then stick it inside of them.  This is NOT suggested as it may cause all sorts of problems. However, that being said, it is quite painful and humiliating, and will probably leave your penis decommissioned for awhile.

Don’t use anything that has a point on it down your shaft.  A straw can work, but the edges on the front might hurt more.  The best thing is to find something smooth and thin to put down the shaft.

If you like the idea of the parachute weights, try tying a string around your balls, then tie something to the string, like a stapler or a can of food.  They will act as a great weight.

If you want to crush your balls or spank them, books work great, and so does a toilet seat!

Another great idea is to use candle wax on your cock and/or balls. Light the candle and let some wax build up, then pour it anywhere you want.  It will work nicely on your nipples too.

Don’t go extreme if it’s your first time, start small and work yourself up.  Your pain tolerance will increase over time, allowing you to take more and more.

Of course, I do not recommend or condone any of the above as it can cause a lot of pain and damage to your body.  However, I have done these and more on phone calls with my clients (never in person).

Explore your fantasies with this recommended phone sex chat line.

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What You NEED to Think about If You’re A Newly Single Woman over 40



Anything you read about being single at 40 will probably suggest how depressing and hard it is Mature dating. Yes, it is hard because social conventions have made it so! But there is nothing depressive about being single at 40. Everyone has their hardships. Maybe you are a widow, maybe you are porced, maybe you are a workaholic and never got married, and maybe you are a single mom. You are a woman who has been through it all and yes it was tough, but it’s nothing to be disheartened about. You are a strong woman of 40 and you deserve to be happy with a man who respects and loves you. So, let’s look at what you need to know before you get back into the dating game:

Dating Has Changed

You have been out of the dating game for long and you need to know that it has changed considerably. It is no longer common that only men pursue women, rather it’s a two-way street now. So, if you have your eyes on someone, go ahead and ask him out.

Decreased Options

Let’s be realistic and realize that the potential pool of men available for dating at this age is small. Most have already settled down with wives and kids. But don’t despair! Studies show that in the United States, there are an equal number of single men and women over 40. So, there are single men your age, even if few.

Men Your Age Prefer Younger Women

Another hard truth you need to know is that a typical man above 40 will happily accept women who are 15 years younger but no more than 3 years older. As absurd as it is, at least you know that the next time a man of your age turns you down, it’s not because of you. It’s because of his preferences.

Younger Men

So, if men can date women much younger than them, why can’t you? Young men in their late 20s and 30s claim that they prefer older women. These men find that older women are much easier to deal with since they are mature, well established and independent. This considerably increases the pool of potential men for dating, given that it’s not out of your comfort zone.

Go Out

Obviously you have to work a little harder to find a suitable dating partner when you are 40 or above. Push yourself to come out of your comfort zone by attending events and social hangouts. Also, get your friends to set up blind dates with people they consider suitable for you. You can also strike up casual conversations with men at places, such as coffee shops, to help you find a date.

Online Dating

These days women over 40 are successfully able to find dates on online dating websites. There are many dating sites that cater to certain age groups. It may seem unconventional but online dating websites have resulted in many success stories, so who knows what you may find there.

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Relationships Top Ten Signs She’s Cheating on You



It looks as if even celebrities get cheated on – what about you? According to, a 2012 survey found that 30% of both men and women, said they might just cheat if they thought their partner would never find out.  What are the signs you should be looking for?

Here’s a top ten. Remember, none of them is a sure-fire sign of cheating, but any of them is an indicator of trouble in your relationship that you should take seriously.

1. She doesn’t want to spend time with your family

If she’s more reluctant than before to spend time with your folks, it could be that she’s feeling like a cuckoo in the nest – not quite genuinely involved. It could be a sign of a bad conscience. .

2. She’s always finding fault with you

If you used to get on very well before and now, all of a sudden, she’s inclined to find fault with every little thing you do, you have a problem. If she’s cheating, she’s using her fault finding to justify the fact that she’s having an affair.

3. She’s got a friend

It’s not just any friend. It’s the kind of friend she doesn’t get around to introducing to you. She doesn’t even like talking about her friend. She also seems to be MIA more often than usual.

4. She’s evasive

In happier times she used to tell you anything and everything – even things you didn’t want to know. Suddenly, she becomes secretive and won’t talk about simple things. You ask her where she was yesterday and she comes back with ‘You don’t own me’ or ‘Why do you want to know?’ Another tell-tale is repeating the question. This is a tactic that’s used while the imagination goes in search of a lie.

5. You don’t seem to be on her list of priorities any more

When a woman gets involved in a new romance, she’s definitely going to treat you as secondary to the primary thing happening in her life at the moment – her new man. She starts spending less and less time with you and even cancels dates.

6. She’s revamped her image

Of course, she might have decided that her wardrobe needs an overhaul on general principles, but a woman who is dating a new guy she sees as a potential partner will also look at upgrading her appearance.

7. These days, it’s ‘I’ not ‘we’

Not only is it a case of using the ‘I’ word more often, she also starts doing things on her own that you used to do together. There’s a possibility that she’s found someone else to keep her happy on these jaunts!

8. She’s losing interest in sex

When you first started dating everything was as hot as could be, but now you get the feeling that she’s tolerating you at best and making excuses to avoid physical intimacy most of the time.

9. She doesn’t want to talk about her plans

You used to know all her movements – not because you asked – she just came out and told you. Nowadays, she’s at ‘meetings’ or ‘going on a business trip’ and you never get a lot of information about the where, when and who side of things.

10. She makes it clear that you’re not important to her

When you share an opinion she feels neither the need to support you nor to enter into an argument. Your compliments are met with shrugs or an absent-minded ‘thank you’. If you can’t make a date, she’s not even disappointed.

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Relationships Operating a Scam — Uncovering the Fraud



The owners of present that site as seeking to expose online dating scams.  There are many online dating scams on the internet. appears to present itself as seeking to make online dating sites more accountable.  But, how much can you trust a site that only lists a hotmail account on its ‘Contact Us’ Page.  What kind of trustworthy business site only lists one hotmail account on its main ‘Contact Us’ page?

A screenshot of this relatively empty ‘Contact Us’ page has been published with this article.

This site to-date presents no telephone number or mailing address that is the kind of information one might expect from a reputable site.  The “WhoIS’ registrar of this site is “Domains By Proxy, LLC” that can be used by companies that was to intentionally conceal the owners of the domain name.

Is that because the owners of have something to hide?  How do we know that does not have a ‘hidden agenda’?  For example, could be designed by an online dating competitor that seeks to discredit its competitors?  Are the goals of altruistic as may users may be led to believe, or could there be a cynical commercial agenda that is associated with this site. is one of the sites that targets for animus.  However, how do we know if is simply hatin’ on a competitor?  In contrast with, is quite upfront about its corporate address:

Having interviewed, it may be possible that the real scammers could be doubles as a casual dating site and an adult entertainment site for users who are seeking to explore fantasies. owners are quite upfront about the mandate of this site which is documeted by site owners on claims could be regarded as reactionary and bordering on internet trolling.

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